Black and Blue Christmas
by SwinkyPie
Summary: A Christmas Kinapping gone wrong with a cheeky fish and a pink Brainbot


_**Black and Blue Christmas**_

"You do realise it's my day off?" she asked.

I heard her flex her hands that were tied behind her back.

"Yes, I'm well aware of that, Miss Ritchi," I answered from my chair that was facing the monitor.

"And I never get days off, Megamind."

"I'm also aware of that too."

I heard her now, huff impatiently likely rolling her beautiful blue eyes, I mean rolling her eyes. Shut up, Brain!

"You're aware of everything," Miss Ritchi sighed.

I smiled.

"I am, ain't I," I chuckled.

I think she shook her head. I grinned even wider. Now just turn on the cameras, done. Now to call to call Metro Man...

"What's with the decorations?" Miss Ritchi asked.

"Its Christmas time, Miss Ritchi," I answered turning the chair around, facing her.

She caught me off guard again. Why must she always do that?

"Isn't it what you humans do at Christmas?"

"Yes, but I mean, why are they blue and black and not red, green or gold?" she asked trying to inch more forward in the metal chair.

"Well, they're my favourite colours and it was Minions idea to put them up cause we had planned to kidnap you and he thought it would be nice to make you comfortable," I answered turning the chair around again.

"Comfortable, yeah sure," Miss Ritchi mumbled, "So...where's Minion?"

"In the other room charging..." I stopped midsentence.

"Up?" Miss Ritchi finished.

I growled and threw my chair back, stopping just before her. I turned the chair around angrily at her.

"Why must you try and succeed in getting information out of me so easily?" I shouted at her.

"How should I know!" she snapped back, "You just tell me! Like you want to!"

"Oh, yes you do know. You know too much. And since when do I want to tell you my plans?"

Roxanne turned her head away from me, nose in the air and her red lips in a pouting motion.

Without thinking, I mumbled, "Temptress."

Roxanne's eyes snapped open and stared straight at me.

"What was that?" she screeched.

"What? I didn't mumble anything like 'Temptress' or anything. You're crazy! What a riot!" I said quickly which likely gave me away. Shot!

"You just gave yourself..."

"Brainbots!" I interrupted her.

Oh, my dear Brainbots. Always there to help. Always, always there to...

"Brainbots, what are you doing?" I shouted.

My so called dear Brainbots were trying to wrap the tape around Roxanne's head not gently place it on her mouth.

"No! Stop! The tape goes on her mouth not around her head! Go call Metro Man!"

I rushed over.

"I'll fix this. Just go and call Metro Man," I snapped pushing the Brainbots away.

The Brainbots just stared at me. I rolled my eyes.

"Do it for, Daddy!" I muttered hoping Roxanne wouldn't hear.

"Daddy?" she asked.

"Botheration," I cursed.

"They call you Daddy?"

"Yes, yes. Let's all laugh at Megamind, Hahahaha!" I snapped as I slowly took off the tape.

"Oww," cried Roxanne.

"Sorry. Nearly done. There."

Roxanne sighed and shook her head around. I sniffed as I slowly walked back to the monitor, sitting back down. No, thanks or anything, how rude of her. She always thanks Minion. Why not me?

Minutes ticked by.

"Your being nice to me," I just heard her whisper.

"Is that a problem?" I asked, wheeling my chair over to her again.

"No, no. It's just..." Roxanne hesitated.

"It's just what?"

"Different."

"Different? Of course it's different!" I shouted throwing my arms in the air, "I hadn't shoved anything or aimed anything at you or hung you from the ceiling!"

"Or feed me to crocodiles." she added.

"Alligators," I corrected.

"Crocodiles, alligators. Same thing."

"No, there not! One lives in Australia and Africa and the other lives in..."

"They are both long lizards things that have very sharp teeth. The point is that this is different," Roxanne interrupted.

"Oh, my dear, Miss Ritchi," I sighed.

Roxanne gave me an odd look.

"I mean, Miss Ritchi. It seems that I know more about this holiday thing than you do."

"I doubt that," she muttered.

"It is the season, Miss Ritchi, for love, joy and...Um joyness," I answered.

Joyness, I saw her mouth to herself.

"Yes, that is true, but it's pronounced 'Tis the Season', Megamind," she corrected me.

"Oh potato, tomato. Now, quiet. I have to call Metro Man," I said wheeling me chair over to the monitor.

"I thought the Brainbots were," Roxanne piped up.

"Oh, yeah," I mumbled, "Forgot about that."

I heard Roxanne laugh.

I growled under my breath.

"Quiet, Roxanne," I hissed.

"No."

"I beg your pardon?"

"No, I will not be quiet, Megamind."

"Yes, you will!"

"No, I won't!"

"Yes!" I shouted moving closer.

"No!" Roxanne shouted back leaning forward.

We continued this, getting closer till a Brainbot appeared above us, the pink one to be exact.

"Spicybot, what are you doing?" I asked it.

"Spicybot?" I heard Roxanne question quietly.

"I thought I out you in repair."

While I was speaking to Spicybot, one of the other Brainbots flew behind Roxanne and untied her, but held her in place. Another flew behind me and held me in place too.

"Megamind, what are they doing?" Roxanne asked.

"I don't know. Spicybot, what is the mean of this?" I demanded.

I heard a giggle. I looked over to the doorway leading to the kitchen. I saw Minion there, grinning, holding something in his hand.

"Spicybot," he called.

Spicybot flew to Minion and Minion gave her the thing he was holding. She flew back to us and hovered above us. The Brainbots holding us let us go but before we could move, the rest of the Brainbots surrounded us.

"Megamind, call them off!" Roxanne snapped.

"I can't! Minion's controlling them," I answered, "Minion! What are you doing?"

"Tis the season, Sir!" Minion replied.

"What do you mean 'Tis the..."

"Megamind look at what Spicybot's holding," Roxanne interrupted.

We both stared at the thing in Spicybot's mouth. It was a plant with white berries and small green leaves.

"Mistletoe," she whispered looking at me.

"Minion did tell me about them," I said staring back at her.

"Really?"

I nodded.

We continued to star at each other. Our faces were moving closer together. Since I first had a good look at her, I had dreamt of this moment.

Bang!

We jumped apart at the sound. The Brainbots flew away, freeing us from their circle. Spicybot dropped the mistletoe.

"Alright, put your hands in the air!" announced Metro Man as he strolled in like he owned the place.

"Just take her!" I snapped.

"Ok...Wait, what?"

"Just take her, I said. I have things to plan," I said picking up the mistletoe and handed it to Roxanne. "Next time be careful who you get stuck underneath this with."

"Megamind," I heard her whisper as I walked out the room.

Metro Man flew out of the room.

"Sir?" Minion asked quietly worried he had pushed me too far.

"Minion fetch me the blueprints for the hover bike. It's time I finished it."

"Yes, Sir!"


End file.
